Wednesday, December 10, 2008

No Drips


We knew a long time ago that having Tineke would be the hardest on Laika.  She has always been so possessive and so attached to me.  She is also very spirited and stubborn and affectionate.  When Tineke was born so was a middle child.  We are doing everything we can to give Laika all of the attention she has been used to.  We try to give her a lot of special time, but the necessary time given to Tineke and the attention that Leif gets going to school are keenly observed by Laika, and she does everything she can to compete for attention.  She does so by making us laugh with her wild bum shaking dances, her super expressive storytelling, or by surprising everyone by running into a room wearing nothing but a smile.  She has learned that she can make me feel really bad after she spills something or drops something and then says, "I'm sorry Mommy, I didn't mean to.  I'm sorry."
Sometimes she comes right out and tells me to put my nipple away and give her a hug.  Other times when she feels neglected she is more pitiful and makes herself into a little snail shape on the floor until someone picks her up for a cuddle or uses her body as a bongo drum.

One day she was overwhelmed by the emotional rollercoaster of her life and was crying.  She wanted to rejoin the fun of whatever it was we were doing and pressed her palms against her eyes saying to herself, "No drips.  No drips."  Her way of saying to herself, "Pull yourself together woman."  It was funny and sad at the same time.   

So there are some tragic moments, but for the vast majority of each day she is still the most vivacious and brilliant girl.  She is very loving with both Leif and Tineke.  She runs to get a cloth to wipe Tineke's chin, she puts her soother in her gently in T's mouth and is even trustworthy enough to help with a bottle without pushing down her little sister's throat.   This example of being able to embrace her challenges (while not ignoring them) gives me a glimpse into what a strong person she is going to be.  I just hope that in the future she'll forego the clothes-dropping and skip straight to the storytelling.

No comments: